A few weeks ago while sitting on the couch and scrolling through Facebook I came across a post on Facebook by @herholisticpath that asked the question,
“Do you consider a Doula a luxury?”
When I think about this question, for me personally, it immediately brings with it thoughts of home birth. I know that doula’s are available to assist with births both in and outside of hospitals, but home birth is the first thing that comes to mind. Many of the replies, in short, answered the question with a response along the lines of “Yes, doula’s are in fact a luxury or a privilege.”
On the flip side of the ,”Yes, it’s a luxury ” responses there were many responses in which women responded to say that the expense of a doula could and should be budgeted for just like any other event or occasion you may plan for. It’s also about the value we place on our birth experience, the services provided, and by whom the services are provided.
Reading this was a huge celebratory wakeup call!
While I had actually never considered hiring a doula for the birth of our first son, a home birth was an experience that I longed for. We visited with a local midwife only to find out that the costs of her services would not be covered under our insurance. A second alternative would have been to have a water birth at a local birthing center. If we went this route, we would also have to do so without the financial assistance of our insurance coverage.
At that point in time I had decided that home birth was certainly a luxury. Despite it not really being what I wanted, I ended up having a smooth birth at a local hospital. The majority of the expenses were covered by our insurance, and we called it a job well done.
After reading the question and responses from many people who chimed in on the Facebook post, I decided that in our situation home birth, and a doula were only out of reach if we allowed them to be. To a certain extent; birth experiences can be planned, and budgeted for just the same as next years vacation or the vacation the year after next if that’s how long it takes. It’s really a matter of what we want to prioritize right now.
In fact, my husband and I had been anticipating a trip to Hawaii as our big vacation for Summer 2019. I’m not too particular, but Hawaii is Kevin’s dream destination! I’m not sure he could ever say no to warm weather and tropical beaches. We had been planning and budgeting to make travel a priority for the last year, and we did a fantastic job this year. We keep a running list of our future destinations on our budget board. As a family we traveled to Mexico, Hunting Island, and New York. With extra time off Kevin was able to spend 2 weeks traveling Europe, and a weekend in Florida.
All of these trips were a result of doing the work, research, planning and prioritizing.
I knew I wanted a home birth, and my husband wasn’t completely opposed to the idea either after having a few of his questions answered. I know if we put the same sort of energy into the planning and prioritizing of this birth experience we can make it happen.
We don’t know what life will look like years from now, but right now we are expecting, and there’s always the possibility that this could be the last time. As long as we are alive and well there’s always the opportunity to prioritize our travels.
This year we are planning for a home birth, and I could not be any more excited to have the opportunity to prepare for what I hope to be a wonderful experience. For me this experience is definitely one that comes to mind when I hear or see something that says, “create the life you want to live. ”
This will be a new experience for all of us, so I’m sure there will be plenty to share with you all along the way.
Have you ever had or attended a home birth? Did you hire a doula? Leave a comment about what you enjoyed most about your birth experience, or the experience of a loved one below.